Beautifully Written

Time really does slip by and people grow up and transfom into the adult they want to be and sooner or later find the love of their life. If i had the skills to write as beautifully as Doll or katie I would more accurately be able to tell you how moved i am by the few words that had been written by my dear friend.

I wish i could post more on the topic but my little bro needs to be woken and taken care of for church. Congrats to the lady who has found her husband to be! Warmest wishes!

Potty Sotry of the year! I thought it was kinda cute.. 

oh soo sweet, u are!

at about 2:50ish i recieved an oh so sweet email (and a long one at that) from my most beautiful Katie C.!
You must understand my great appreciation for emails from friends! Especially long ones! Although sometimes i dont have time to reply to them or really read them i always look at them (and later reread them thoroughly)! My dear Katie is one of the better friends at emailing. :)) as rarely as she thinks she writes me its more often than most of my friends (excluding fwds). The REAL WRITTEN, the ones that take time, are the ones that mean the most. Love ya KT! xoxo

Onto other updates, I bought The Road Less Traveled today!! I'm gonna reread, take notes and then send it off to Poland to be shared with Kris and all his friends!! :D:D It's a great book! I'd get all my friends a copy but that's not possible!

A LETTER TO YOU FROM SATAN

I saw you yesterday as you began your daily chores.

You awoke without kneeling to pray. As a matter of fact, you didn't
even bless your meals, or pray before going to bed last night.
You are so unthankful, I like that about you.

I cannot tell you how glad I am that you have not changed your way of living, Fool, you are mine.

Remember,you and I have been going steady for years, and I still don't love you yet. As a matter of fact, I hate you, because I hate God.

I am only using you to get even with God.

He kicked me out of heaven, and I'm going to use you as long as
possible to pay him back.

You see, Fool, GOD LOVES YOU and HE has great plans in store for you.

But you have yielded your life to me, and I'm going to make your life a living hell. That way, we'll be together twice. This will
really hurt God.

Thanks to you, I'm really showing Him who's boss in your life with all of the good times we've had.

We have been watching dirty movies,
cursing people out,

stealing,

lying,

being hypocritical,

fornicating,

overeating,

telling dirty jokes,

gossiping,

being judgmental,

back stabbing people,

disrespecting adults,

and those in leadership positions,

no respect for the Church,

bad attitudes.


SURELY you don't want to give all this up.

Come on, Fool, let's burn together forever. I've got some hot plans for us. This is just a letter of appreciation from me to you.

I'd like to say "THANKS" for letting me use you for most of your

foolish life.

You are so gullible, I laugh at you. When you are tempted to sin,
you give in HA HA HA, you make me sick.

Sin is beginning to take it's toll on your life. You look 20 years older,

and now, I need new blood.

So go ahead and teach some children how to sin.

All you have to do is smoke, get drunk or drink while under-aged,

cheat,

gamble,

gossip,

fornicate,

and live being as selfish as possible.

Do all of this in the presence of children and they will do it too.

Kids are like that. Well, Fool, I have to let you go for now. I'll be back in a couple of seconds to tempt you again. If you were smart, you would run
somewhere, confess your sins, and live for God with what little bit of
life that you have left. It's not my nature to warn anyone, but to be your
age and still sinning, it's becoming a bit ridiculous.

Don't get me wrong, I still hate you.


IT'S JUST THAT YOU'D MAKE A BETTER FOOL FOR CHRIST.


P.S. If you love me, you won't share this

throwin it out there!

Does ANYONE know how and where on earth my dear emily yancer is??!?!!! or at the VERY LEAST know if shes a counselor this year?!?

Looks like i'll be goin to teen camp this year too! i've been debating and i guess an ipod can wait.. ;) :(:)
love ya laff! xoxoxo
my love to my dear Katie too! :))

And the search continues

I bought one thing today for a special someone! :D:D:D Gina and I are working on something.. :D AND i went to borders today at the mall and they didnt have The Road less traveled. So another day i'll go back out to the other borders.
Today, i went in search of Faust. my library doesnt have it but the new cumberland has faust in book form and another lib. has the music.. :D:D so i placed a hold.
OK! love ya'lls! (DP, DOll, Katie, Emily, Gina andso on..)

The Letdown

First lets blow off some steam, then we can start! My mother dearest, whom no one should ever rely on i might add, promised me (and i have it written and signed on paper) that i'd get some money back that she owed me and that she'd take me out to get my new strings on thursday. Well, of course u know what happened if it was a letdown. She had one of her 'days' or shall i say nights that turned into days and she didnt take me and nor did i get the money i was expecting to come in. But do not worry! after all morning having a pity party for myself after getting a dramafilled morning since 6:30am my grandmother, the great person she is, took me out herself and i got the strings i've been dying to get FOREVER!!! SO, i am playing my violin again and this is the longest i've gone since i got my strings on thurs. that i haven't had my violin in my hands. :D AND this year i might bring it to camp with me!!! (thats if my grandma lets me) Monday i'm hoping to go out and familiarize myself with some disney movie songs for my dearest emily and learn a few..:D And speaking of Emily, half the gettys' pathfinders and I all want to know if shes going to be at camp this year or not.. I REALLY want to know because i want to chose her for my counselor when i'm doing CIT. :)) so.. people, my dear readers (katie) can we please let nikki in whether or not emily is gonna be there? if not i guess i'll just HAVE to ask Dear Denise!
AND before i go, everyone wish dearest and most beloved Dolly happy bday!! ;) shes getting old u know! ;) AND all week long she performed Faust and boy was she amazing!! and how do I know??? well.. because I got the details from friends! lol no i didnt go to poland.. as much as i wish i could have been..i wasn't.. tis a sad week knowing i could see her perform.. shes a good actress u know!! :))))
papapa! as the polish would say! ;)

Can you Believe it??

EVERYONE!! MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE!!!!! I AM A CIT AT the VERY LAUREL LAKE CAMP THIS YEAR!!!
And guess what else!!! a friend of mine from school, his sister went to LLC a couple of years back her name is Jess A. And to think! I found out today because i was doodling (again) in math class.. writing Laurel lake Camp and such..as usual. But i found out today and i'm pestering him to goo too!! well not pestering him but i really want them to go. and when he found out abby goes.. he just like flipped! and i said, "i'm taking her to bma with me" hes like NO!!! U CAN"T!! i wont let YOU!! it was funny.. ya'd have to be there..but anywho.. i HAD to let ya'll know i'm CIT!!! i'm SOO HAPPY!!!
AND today i was reminded that my grandmothers 100th day is coming up.. I'm debating whether or not i really want to go.. :(( its very saddening..
AND another depressing thing... my music/orchestra teacher is retiring this year...:'( she is amazing! i think i've only had like.. 4 since i started violin and she is the best i've ever had. we've had soo many good times!!! I can't believe she is leaving! it is heartbreaking, really. I dont know if i would say she was inspiring but she made it loads more fun. She made rehearsals fun especially. I don't know how or anything like that it was just a very light atmosphere and there wasn't any pressure. and OF COURSE concerts were fun!!! it was like a rehearsal but with audience and we got to stomp our feet and watch the lights do funny things. and i got a few laughs out of mrs. wentz and her seriousness. good times! good memories!

An Equal Music(pardon the grammar)

I have started this book when was it... Monday? Yes, it must have been Monday and I have not gotten as far as I hoped by the end of the week. I am just entering the 4th part and I'm dying to jump back into the book. With every few pages I am reminded of the person who introduced me to this book and I am constantly relating the two and their similarities. I'm picking up that in some ways the book is somehow enlightening me on some pychology matters. I believe, that the books one reads, somehow portrays who one is deep inside, or more less one’s thoughts; their subconscious thoughts or maybe 'dreams'. What I mean by dreams is, the things one doesn’t realize they want but their subconscious mind does, and sometimes only books could satisfy what reality can't.

...I just had a conversation with someone whom is not one of my favorites... she was trying to pick an arguement with me and basically telling me i didnt have any h/s friends, all my friends were 'old gezers', that i lead a boring life by just reading and doing h/w, that i dont have a social life because i'm never 'out'. That i'm NOT going to BMA. In my defense i said i'm a social butterfly from 5am-10pm (sometimes til 2am) 6 days a week. (as far as saturday goes, i am still social, but not with school ppl) I AM going to BMA, and i never said i was going in 9 and that i wasn't gonna be at RL at all. i may have hoped it but i never said it was gonna happen. Reading is NOT boring, and i never said that h/w wasn't and that i don't have the tolerance for the immaturity and drama of teenage higshoolers. she began with me being boring and never going out.. which is very true.. but i CHOOSE not to go out for my own reasons.


me: but just for the record, reading IS fun, u just need to find the right book.
person: all you do is read and do homework
person: no its really not
aKmLiFe91: your definition of fun is different from mine
o this is too complicated.. me is akm and mon is person
me: i dont JUST DO h/w and read
person: you are there sitting down and by yourslelf
meso what
Person: that is boring

Me:i dont NEED to be a social butterfly 24/7
me i'm socialable 6 days a week
me: from 5-10
person: that is how you ake friends your age
me: sometimes till 2am
person: yea
me: ake?
me: i HAVE friends my age
person: that is how you make friends your age by going to the mall going to the movies put down the book and do something
person: nicole i hate to say this but alot of your friends are out of high school
me: i have plenty of them, i just dont hang out wit them all the time b/c of all the immaturity and all the small talk and all the stupid things and so on..
person: you are friends with teachers
me: not necessaryily
person: i dont want friends that are older
me: i am aquantinces with teachers
person: you are what ....
and so it went on and on...
my book is calling for me. It may leave without me. something might happen! ;)

Guess who?!?!?!

Well, c'mon guess! Guess who i was talking to last night!! NO, not dolly!!
.....

The VERY BEAUTIFUL and MOST lovely katie Carlson!!! Yes! indeed! i WAS talking to her! well, although it was a short talk, I DID talk to her! I mean how much better could sabbath get now??? sabbath is here and i talked to Katie!! THE KATIE!! The only one! The one who's been on my dresser for who knows how long, the one that has 'barney purple' hair, the one who has those BEAUTIFUL blue eyes, the one whom I LOVE so VERY MUCH!
So, I just had to tell the world that I, nicole f., got to talk to Katie Carlson tonight!

Happy Sabbath Guys!!

What a horrible Nighmare

Driving up the lane to the lodge at camp, I was already seeing soo many changes. the cabins had all been moved and rebuilt. They were grey and two floors with ugly windows. The lodge seemed some how different and nothing had the welcoming feeling and the smell of country air about it. Everyone working was different and didn't take pride in their job. They were uncamplike people, i dont know how else to put it. The horses we always had were no longer there and Frank and Gina were names that were ever heard of. The Pool and lake were no longer themselves. The lake had lost all its joy, and the unmistakeable whole on the right side was filled,and the indian village was gone. The pool.. it was the same but it felt creepy like there was some sort of catastrophe that had happened there and everyone vacated the area.
oh, the people.. That was the worst- besides the atmosphere itself. The people were distant and.. i dont know what.. They didnt have the crazy, God loving fun in them. The memories were gone and that was where it ended.
I'm glad its not going to be like that!!! Thank goodness its not!!

“The white Rose” in question(this may be a delicate subject for few viewers, just a forewarning)

I don’t know how or where to start. I had this all in my head last night around 10ish or 11ish but have since forgotten how I was going to start into the subject so I’m gonna dive right into it. OK?

“The white Rose”, a lesson before mentioned by a fellow friend in their blog is about a Christian’s purity. Well.. I frankly don’t know how to put this so bare with me. I have before been accused of not being “pure” and some others have accused me of have sexual relations with another person both male and female. I don’t know where some of these people are getting these assumptions but I wish it would stop. I have been constantly related to being that “impure” person on several occasions, a few of them with my own family members. My own mother has accused me right out front of such unchristian-like activities. I would be lying if I said that most recently another person from my family has accused me, but I WAS getting that assumption when she came up to me on Sunday afternoon during my bros bday party that she was accusing me of doing ‘things’. And so I am going to put this to rest as much as possible, knowing that some of those viewers read this blog here and there.

I am STILL A VIRGIN and I am not a bit ashamed of it, thank you. I know right from wrong and what God advises on such subjects. i'm not perfect either just for the record. For all of u curious people, when I think it is the right person I will devote myself to him full heartedly, and that certain someone will be a Christian and not just one that says he is. That someone will also understand and respect my decision to stay pure and the time will eventually come (which IS WAY down the road-after I get married!!) All of the guys that I associate with clearly know my intentions and know that i am a christian and respect that. I am not a difficult woman!! They will know if I like them and if I don’t have feelings for them.
I still feel like I’m not hitting the topic I want to…aiming towards...

I have never found the harm in talking to a person of the opposite sex. Although I do know of the dangers that go with them I have never met someone who has tried to well... trespass me. I have never found the harm in being in company of another guy alone because we are never in a secluded place. It has always been relatively public. People were always free to come and go as they pleased.
Until recently I have really never been hurt or maybe the phrase I want would be… surprised to be confronted with such a thing from a certain person. I’m not sure anymore if I would say hurt but its going to take me some time to bounce back and ‘reconnect’ to this person, if u will.

U guess, going back to the white rose theory, It is a very sacred thing to me and I do not plan for the rose to be ripped apart any time soon. I am still trying to remember what exactly it was I DID want to say and so I still feel like I’m not hitting the correct topic. I am STILL wondering how some people could connect me to such actions or assume such things. I have never given people reason to think anything less than that perfect white rose that I hold so dear to me. But as for the doubting people, I am and will be for a long time be that perfect white rose that’s going to stay in a glass case, like that red rose in “beauty and the beast”.
I dunno.. But I’m gonna’ go for now.. I remember eventually want I WANTED to say but until then I’ll just have to leave it be… I want to get into “An Equal Music.”