Whatever...Goodbye

i've been wanting to use that title for the longest time. i like it. i don't know why i like the phrase but i do. ]

If anyone remembers, i've said before everything seems to happen after i've come home from camp, right? well, camp hasn't even come or started yet and something has happened. ok.... something(s). The family's m+m nana has died. Yesterday afternoon around 3pm. There isn't much to say. The picture in a previous post with nana and the little girl that's her. It's funny because everyone came to see nana at least twice in the time she's been in the hospital. someone was almost always with her during the day. most of the time it was her daughter, my grandma fisher. at least 3/4 of her grandchildren came to visit her in the hospital. Nana was everyone's favorite. Everyone in the family went to her. she'd go out with her grandkid Deb, my aunt, every thursday to go shopping or out to eat or just out. my cousin loved her a lot. There's one thing I can't stand. And that's to see Emily hurting. That's almost the only thing or person that will get me to cry. Yesterday was the second time in not even a year yet that i saw Emily in pain like that. In... sorrow. The better part of it is that she ran 11 sets of stairs twice and 1/2 and i ran them not even once. We got to sit on the 11th floor on the hospital and enjoy alive water and share a piece of cheesecake. way to be healthy.
So here's how i can relate the whatever...Goodbye part into all this. Actually, into something completely unrelated. Mom's in her old self again. She disowned me (again) this morning. she claims she didn't and i can't prove that she did because it was over the phone. but whatever. I went throught the crying part already this morning and i'm on break from that. She's being difficult. Hence the wanting of Dolly around. I even contemplated calling Laura this morning just to hear someone talk to me but figured it was a bit too early for that and it's her day off. My thought process ended up with i can just walk it off, it'll be healthy for me and i have no need that is that urgent that it is necessary for me to call Laura at this hour. So i walked 2 1/2 miles at 6:30 this morning and listened to evanesence, eminem, mandy moore(only hope x4) starfield, caedmon's call and michael w. smith all this morning.
My auntie chris is awesome. she makes me smile...