PAST

Reading through my blogs... :-) happy moments, still happy unchanged moments :-)

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

wow... and i remember this now...

"I want my Jesus. I want to physically feel his arms around me and hear his heartbeat as it pulses calmly in my ear. I want my Jesus to tell me what's going on for me, but if he doesn't speak at all, i'll still be content.

So here i go to complain, like all the rest of the world- i will allow myself to be flushed away into what i consider this unacceptable behavior.

I want a friend to not fight with, to be able to talk with, to not have to fight for their attention, I want to be someone's friend, a real Jesus loving friend. One that doesn't live through habit, one that embraces change and deals with my fickleness and is supportive and we grow together with bible in hand. Where has that gone? how about a mentor? "

well, i have made a friend like that... currently my ex actually.. but he's still got this and i'm thankful for that. He has and hopefully always be like this. AND for the future of this year, this is what i aime for. Well, besides wanting my Jesus, who i had a date with today. The friend part- i will be all me and will fight to not be sucked into the human nature of everything proverbs says something against.. something like that... yea, so i pretty much read proverbs through twice today... two different versions.. actually still reading it in NCV but i'm taking a break... I went into coolige park today- hehehe and saw a water fountain! i wanted so badly to play in it... :-/ and a carousel!


and wow... so my hope of moving to maryland failed because the person i was going to live with got engaged... so thats why that didnt happen over the summer...