baby, it's cold outside

thanks to ktC

If not showing cause of stupid issues go to Capitals

Loss

I love, really really love, semi-late phone calls just to say goodnight. Does anybody do that anymore? Phone calls just to say "guess what?... I love you." I have a really cool friend like that. (jealous much??) (actually a couple but...) I want to share my friend with the whole world. Tell everyone how little moments transmogrify(cool word!) really lousy days into something where i can't pinpoint any one moment that was all that terrible at all. Even when I've had a beautiful day, it's icing on the top. It's a good night's sleep. It's a warm feeling that relaxes and sooths. its the moment where maybe i could cry and everything would be all ok.

and then there's the random phone calls from far away friends.. well actually not really far away... like only a state.

Anyway, 4 people i love a lot in one day. how do i get so lucky?? God must really love me!! anyway, maybe i should get on writing something different.

OH yea, I have nothing going for me in my future, by the way. I'm going to be a hopeless single person for my whole life. Maybe write a book or two.. I hope they're best sellers. I have zero skill in anything that'll move me forward. sorry colleges and bachelors and really good jobs. It was pointed out to me today.

ok so i have to go cause my bro is not going to sleep. He must have hearing problems..

My Life

Right now, i'm in a bit of a very big hole. I've lost something very important. I went looking for it today and couldn't find it and now, I don't know where it would be. I've looked in some places it isn't. So, I ask please pray that i find it VERY soon. I need it in order to do anything.

Second, And also important, but can't work out as well unless i have the first is mission trip to Africa. I've sent in my application but as far as i know there's only a certain amount of students who get to go. I really really want to be in Africa and do something great abroad. So pray, pray, pray that i can go. I'm getting my passport on Wednesday if the plans don't fall through with my mom.

3. Dolly: no, she is fine. But right now seeing her is in the air. She leaves the day i return to school. She has no car and my mom, my dear mother, has scheduled herself for everyday of the week, to work. Yes, work IS important. I'm selfish. It's a selfish request. To actually be able to spend the day with her would be great. i only see her once a year and talk to her rarely anymore. To visit her is my Christmas present. Also some silents.

4. Gary: He's been having lots of asthma attacks. I think he's got girl issues he needs to figure out. And some other things.

5. Abby: praise: she's got a great head and she's pretty darn smart. Ask God to keep her out of trouble.

6. My auntie: Tomorrow is my aunts bday.

7. Joan: she's helping me get my passport and she has a lot of other things she is doing. She helps out a lot of different people.

Here Waiting

Patience is something i often lack. The end..

disappointing addictions

Sometimes- a lot of times- i wish i had deep topics to talk about. Emotions to share, and perspectives to broaden. To my own disappointment, fulminating about life is the central point of my postings.I would have stopped posting a long time ago if it weren't for my needy habits to write, and if that were to happen, then no one would know if i were alive. Sometimes that's not a bad thing either.

My english teacher, is regularly reminding me to compose more abstract ideas about short stories we've read, books I've read on my own, and anything else she asks us to comment on. I see her purpose, but not everything i read screams to me profoundness as it does her. But she IS an English teacher and maybe I'll appreciate these things later in life.

My postings don't scream for advice or promote comments either though. Maybe my blogging is more for myself rather than others, although its free for others to read.

It feels like forever since I've last really written anything. poems and stories. I've thought up a few in my head lately though. none i remember though.

Pessimism is muy malo. I'm naturally supposed to be very pessimistic. it's ok though. I'm not a complete disappointment.

Even this makes me want to go back... soo badly... i miss camp... no yoke! I take it back!! really, i Do wanna go... i'm gonna miss those campers....

good times brings sad reminders

Jack Johnson

Wishin, and waiting.. Dolly is in America officially. Safely, I assume. That's about it.
homleave is this week and exams are still coming! hurray.....!!

Fly Away

Well, incase anyone cares, Dear Dorothy ann will be leaving poland tomorrow! Tomorrow is also the messiah and i wonder when Katie and all those union people come home. Andew's is already home. Sadly David an Liz are not. :(( Sad story there. And i will not be able to see them before i leave on homelave on the 20th. Anyway, Dolly is coming home!Pray i get to see her!!! Please!

OK, well i'm off to go to work. I need to do the Chemistry Review!

~Be confident in everything~

Aliveness

"No, it's not a depressing season!!! shopping is good, family time is good(to extent), seeing shawn is good, sleeping is good, eating is good/bad, and snow can be good, xmas trees are good, fireplaces are good. family means arguing with each other, watching of other parent's kids who don't listen, too much sleep(not good), gaining unwanted weight-which isn't much of a worry when others in the family make up for the food i don't get to, too cold and slippy roads which prevents traveling, sneezing, not being able to see the ppl i love the most during the season thats supposed include that detail. but on the other hand, emily and I get to hang out. and last year i saw 3 people i wasn't expecting. "
I feel like more and more i'm arguing with myself over why i shouldn't be sad. mood swings and unscheduled time of depressedness. All of it is unnecessary, and i wanna will myself to stop. ... other times i don't care enough to think about stopping. maybe its my selfishness in wanting to spend more time with some long-ago friends/far away ppl, or the lack of input i have on other's lives. It could be the shortage in self-confidence. Whatever it is, I don't want it here right now. It makes me unsocial and self-absorbed and tired. But being tired isn't always bad cause i have a nice little bed that i really love, complete with a warm comforter and blankets.. But also missing something. (other than Cassie-the pillow) it has plenty of static electricity, however. whatever... i'm feeling tiny... gotta go. dizzy maybe...

The two boys in the one picture is my cousin, John, and Shawn.

The other picture if one of R. Bechtal's kids at school. She's a cutie! She came one evening to the dorm with Bechtal and was helping me work on an xmas present for Liz.

Anywho, thought i'd update before i have to return to 'the bubble.'

procrasinate with me?

When the week is over and yumyum day has passed, i'm left with leftovers, chemistry chapters to read and hundreds of pages to finish by tomorrow night. I have excuses however, so if one doesnt suffice then maybe one of the other options will.
1. time to sleep
2. time to spend with shawn
3. sleep
4. days to do nothing
5. catch up with old friends
6. get better from being sick
7. eat, eat and more eating
8. shop for xmas
9. spend time with emily and fam.
10. accept a new family member
11. update computer and wathc movies

36 Days!

I think i'm almost done christmas shopping!! It's soo exciting!!!!!
David and Lizzy and Dolly come home for christmas!! Oh so exciting!!! What i would do if i could.... Like drive!! hahaha Thats something i need to learn to do.

I would talk about so much if it wouldn't give away all i'm doing. But, I'm very excited about christmas. It may have become my favorite holiday minus the family dramas and lots of babysitting.

ok thats it. just wanted to express my excitement about this holiday!

later foos!
ps: i'll be online over this break and i'll be answering my phone too so get in touch with me! u know you want to!

Thanksgiving

I'm home for thanksgiving break. One whole week! :)) Shopping, sleep and homework/studying...

Give Thanks

1. Dolly being able to come home
2. Emily
3. Auntie
4. prayer
5. Lizzy
6. David and Mcauliffe family
7. Homeleaves
8. my cellphone
9. hugs
10. Bma sponsors
11. Nases
12. My bible
13. texts
14. Christmas!!!!
15. Guys
16. family
17. airplanes
18. mission trips
19. rain and snow
20. being able to travel
21. fresh air(although not necessarily clean)
22. jeans and sweatpants
23. fleece blankets and cassanova
24. internet
25. work for me to do
26. recognizing real love
27. Mrs. Bechtal
28. speech
29. my grandma fisher
30. music
31. my roomate being so cool
32. Carly
33. sunshine
34. heartbeats
35. faith, hope and trust
36. education
37. having time to read, write and do projects
38. CLEAN SHOWERS!!!!!!
39. Dust and mildew free places (allergy free environments)
40. Anthony and Peter

How to start. Inductive or deductive.
Two new concepts. I forget which i like more. I think it's inductive.

Anywho, If i didn't tell the story yet. Mr. Corbin passed out in class a couple months ago. He's been out for a while. Mr. Grandpa Morgan has been teaching my class. Which is a good thing. Anywho, I saw him at church this weekend. Oh man.... Oh man. His memory isn't all there. It was heartbreaking. Sitting in the third row, there he sat. He wore a sling on his left arm and was wearing his big ol' glasses. His eyes whispered to me his vulnerablity while he sat there with a smile and a hello. He asked me my name and what class i was in with him. Heartbreak.... Spewed out on that orange carpet, there's my heart. My salty tears were on another's sleave for a moment before i went up to the pulpit to sing for song service. Thrown on the floor and back in my chest in less than 60 seconds i would think. Crazy. But anywho, pray for Corbin guys cause he has to have brain surgery next month.
And on that prayer list too.. Abby G, and bma people and Maya.

AND CHRISTMAS!!!!!!! CHRISTMAS AND A CAR!!!!! My mom gave me the ok to spend my xmas break with Dolly as long as i was home for xmas day. So car... pray for a car.

I like all of these

Here are some pictures that i really liked when i went looking for them

one down, one to go.
working on that dolly list..... try to post before i leave.


aparently i'm too cool and i must have grown up over night as well.. I think i'm deep as well??


love you doll

Last Day

heading back to Bma today. Before i do so though, I'll need to call dolly dearest (thats if i get her number) and i'll be going fabric shopping to get ready for an xmas present.

Actually i didn't get much done at all over homeleave. I did my homework and went book shopping. Oh, and blew sixy bucks.

My trip to the doctor's office included sitting on the doctor's table thing. I had my weight checked (117lbs.) and waited for my doctor to come. Diagnoses. I had the same thing last year. Upper resp. infection. but now i have an ear infection. no biggy except i spent most of homelave sleeping.

The Dolly List

the reason why i didn't post all the things i wanted to do with dolly was because i can't remember 90% of the things we said we'd do together.

1. get hair braided
2. hugs
3. pick mus1rooms
4. listen to dolly sing live
5. go shopping
6. have a cry fest
7. read all day together
8. Read the bible together
9. have prayer together
10. get my butt kicked (hopefully not literally)
11. get lectured
12. be told i'm loved
13. Play violin together
14. swim
15. go to the resevoir (old bma pool)
16. go on a walk
17. Go to the city for a day
18. sing out loud
19. road trip!!
20. paint something

That's all i can think of right now...

30 Things list +

in English we had to do a 30 things list of things we want to do before we die. I'm going to add some i think...These are in no particular order just in the order i thought of them.. after number 12 it started to get really hard for me to think of things.

1. sponsor a child overseas
2. love deeply and honestly
3. affect/influence someone deeply (positively)
4. adopt a child
5. learn to cook
6. read the bible with someone close to me, everyday
7. ballroom dance
8. publish a book (autobiography preferably)
9. bun-gee jump
10. Go to thailand in honor of my grandma and learn to cook thai
11. visit the place my grandma lived/grew up
12. Have my love clearly expressed without misinterpretation
13. Get baptized
14. lead 5 people to christ
15. Take my brother to his first dance
16. Teach my brother (how) to respect the ladies
17. To trust fully
18. Apply self-discipline to everyday life
19. Be spontaneous
20. surprise Justin :)
21. Go to Broadway
22. Visit to New Zealand
23. Stay in another country and learn culture
24. Be a bride's maid
25. Ride in hot air balloon with significant other?
26. Get lost - drive cross-country without a plan
27. Run away- walk 500 miles
28. have a family
29. own a horse
30. give everything away for a good cause
31. pick mushrooms with dolly and do everything else on the do with dolly list
32. be serenaded
33. learn to sing a song for someone
34. paint a room
35. not smile for a whole day or talk for that matter.

just go and watch.... http://fc01.deviantart.com/images3/f/2005/149/5/4/friends.swf

How Fishey Died

as of 2:30 i am dead.
Carly and Michelle had this wonderful idea this afternoon and decided that they were going to kill me.-Mostly it was Carly's decision to murder me.

"Let's wrap nikki up in ducktape!"
"ok!!"
"Then we can put her in the back of a car and let her sink to the bottom of the lake"
Excuse me "Back of a truck"... and as long as i'm not in the sea(c), cause i don't swim there.

And this is how i died...
I was wrapped up in duck tape, thrown in the backseat of a truck and pushed to the bottom of the lake. No one knew that anything happened, so no one came to save me. Talk about a code blue.

Wonder what happened to me..

Ramblings of me...

Ramblings of me....


In the dawn
My heart races
In search of new seas
The Chorus, I hear
Bows in unison
Unlike our worlds
Clashing like the waves
In a storm
Freeing slaves
Rushing north
Boys want to go south
The bubble doesn't pop
It never existed
Like the homes we wanted
And the beatings we didn't
(So I run
Into the arms that will save me
Maybe he'll open the door for me
Let me run in
Catch me there.)
Don't leave me here
Where the ruins
Wrought with distortion...

-nicole a. fisher, 2007

Dash and little brothers

Your Score: Dash

You scored 30% Sociability and 58% Sophistication!

There's no denying that you have a certain flair. You don't mind being around others, especially your little brother, the hyphen, but you rarely emerge except when needed. You respond well to those who know how to treat you, but have only contempt for those who don't--you tend to embarass them every chance you get. Your only enemy is the colon--he will sometimes try to move in on your turf.

Link: The Which Punctuation Mark Are You Test written by Gazda on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

The good works of righteous people will not save them if they turn to sin, nor will the sins of evil people destroy them if they repent and turn from their sins. Ezekiel 33:12

As destructive as the power of sin is, God says it won't destroy you if you turn from it. There is hope and restoration with Jesus!

I am satisfied with the new colorscheme of my blog and the pictures everywhere. The Asisan touch as well.....

Friday Night

Love Too Strong

Hands untouched

By a love afar

Dark eyebrows
Defined eyes
A green serene

One look unique to the person

Dimples noted

Especially when smiling

Groban frazzled hair

Lips declare love

But never invaded

Thin, shaped and wide

Beauty mark below rosy cheeks

Both man and boy revealed-

Vulnerable

Beneath the ice

Heart too weak.

-nicole fisher



I'm still waiting for pictures from Nase but until then i thought this would work.
The above picture was taken by Carlita during an expidition to find a picture for my wall in my room.
The poem was a sudden inspiration during english class. I had thrown a bunch of descriptions together the following class and that was it. I don't write anymore. Not poetry in the least. Too depressing and not very good anyway. So this is probably one of my last for a while.

I'm excited for x-mas. Carlita knows why. Partially because I'm going to the king of Presia.

home sweet home

i really recomend going to this place, deviant art. it's sorta become one of my new favorite places to waste away time. :))

I'm ready for homeleave. Sleep, eating, getting hair done, spending time with Emily. Calling Dolly/ or she calling me, talking on the phone, buying a new phone, geting a laptop case... spending money(not so much a highlight)... browsing for a teddy bear, sewing a teddybear, and being antisocial when i want to. :)) OH! and learning a new song!!!! suite no. 1 by bach!! i'm soo excited!

He saved us, not because of the good things we did, but because of his mercy. He washed away our sins and gave us a new life through the Holy Spirit. Titus 3:5

God's great mercy caused him to save you. In spite of what you've done, he couldn't stand living without you! He even gave you his own holiness!

He saved us, not because of the good things we did, but because of his mercy. He washed away our sins and gave us a new life through the Holy Spirit. Titus 3:5

God's great mercy caused him to save you. In spite of what you've done, he couldn't stand living without you! He even gave you his own holiness!

He saved us, not because of the good things we did, but because of his mercy. He washed away our sins and gave us a new life through the Holy Spirit. Titus 3:5

God's great mercy caused him to save you. In spite of what you've done, he couldn't stand living without you! He even gave you his own holiness!

Quality Time

I am spending or spent the weekend at the Nase's. I'm just stopping to say hello. Kelsey has pictures that she'll send me that i took for dolly's viewing pleasure. It'll make you smile. Anywho, they're cool.

i'm off..

So this is what i wanna do. I want to graduate this year. i have 70 hrs to complete but i put my proposal through the board and they said no... i have 3 classes to complete for nxt year. it's a waste to spend $15000 for an extra year so IF i 1) go back to public school this year and drop out saving my grams 15000(which is prob. my last option at the moment), 2) online classes and get the transcript transfered, 3) fight the board. fighting the board sounds the easiest right now. i just don't wanna spend 15000 to take 3 classes. so i find it very pointless. and the other detail is i WANT to graduate from BMA and i dont wanna go to public school and i only would want to go back for the classes. :)) well and a few people.

so input/advice please?!?!
dolly, i know u dont want me rushing.. i heard u the first time...

so i'm at school it's going well. not bad. i like all my classes and classmates. there's not much more. i'm looking for books to read for the year. american lit for english thats my main concern. i need to find 4 american lit books and then just a booklist.

love you Gina.. call me
miss you katie!
Dolly, come home!

My bubble, cookies, and hugs

I spent three-hundred bucks.... It sounds like a lot, right? That 'a lot' got me little. Now that i think about it, i feel like i should've saved that money... Actually, technically i only spent $200 and my grandma gave me $120. So that made me happy. I feel like i have a lot this year to take. Really, I don't... My roommate last year had soo much stuff. SO MUCH. But it was good cause she shared. :)) I will really miss my roommate this year, actually.We really did have good times, besides the arguing. We had discussions/arguing. I think thats just where God wanted me last year. I'm really super excited about having Gabby E. as my roommate this year though! it's gonna be soo chill.

The summer is almost over. I spent most of it up at camp working in the kitchen. Kitchen is probably one of the most fun jobs (besides counselor) especially with the boss I had. I really shouldn't go back to camp with the stuff i'll need to pay for this year but i feel like maybe i could go back another year. I already told ms. Denise i didn't want to come back. I don't think it's worth the drama. But the kids... they're charming. Whoever decided that that job's moto was 'it's all about the kids' was completely right. It is all about the kids. camp isn't camp unless the staff can show God to them through them to the campers. It's not camp unless everything, EVERYTHING, is in devotion to the campers. There's a slight problem though. Affection to the campers is restricted in the way that i connect to people. sometimes the adventure campers just need to be able to sit on your lap. It's how they bond. It's how I bond. hugs are a necessity. without that i don't think i would have gotten a wee bit close to Katie C. Especially last summer. I mean, hugs make everything better!!! especially when you KNOW that person means it. It's even better when they're not the type to just give out hugs. But camp is still good, not the same as it used to be but still worth going back for. But i really do miss how the barn used to be (cough, cough Kt).

I'm a little nervous on what it is you find so different about me, dolly. I hope it's not bad. I actually wouldn't mind a Dolly lecture though... I actually have a reason that you could give me a lecture about/for. But that's for a conversation. ;) not now.. :P
I'm REALLY excited to go back to school, not for school, for the people. I've decided i can form to bma's society and it's bubble. No, what i'm truly excited about is to see Dan. Dan... He's been far away, off in Alaska, away from me.... :'( (tear...) Dan is like... like... Dan. He's pretty much the coolest guy in the states. The best thing yet is that he's no longer a village student. I hope.. :) So that means vespers and sabbath and after church and lots and lots of chill time! Dan, wherever you are right now, may you know i'm thinking of you and i can't wait too see that hair of yours and that so-called buff-ness you've obtained. ;)
And then there's the other jerk-face... whom i also miss... but not like Dan. Dan was too far away for too long. Seperation anxiety!! :P hahahaha
Listen to me Dan-- Don't ever leave again!!!!!

~So back to reality~
The love topic- yes again
I think i'm learning to love all over again. The semi-right way. The last couple years threw me off track- the reason i don't know. What i do know is that i hope to put it in practice. I think it may be a bit much to just love everybody all at once because love takes action.I'm glad that i've learned something after all the arguing and state of denial deal. (God and his odd ways.. purpose to everything) It's odd how easily i was won over though.. I think it was official after i got a book.. Stupid books.. I think i may have a different approach to everything now. It scares me a little. it will take time.
I'm stupid really. Because over the summer i was talking at the commitment fire and i said it myself. I told them, When I love someone, giving Liz as my example since it was someone they knew, i'll drop everything i'm doing to be there for that person- to love them. I started rambling off a bunch of things that i'd done with/for liz because she's my friend and i loved her. (hahaha love-trust. it wasn't quite a love trust relationship) (note to self: discussion about how hard it would be to love everyone because that means you have to trust them as well.thats rough..) in comparison to God, he'll twist and turn every which way to make something happen for you if it's his will. He wants you to know that He is your best friend and he WILL remind you everyday that he DOES love you and will ALWAYS love you.He'll repeat himself as many times as he as to. I told them, yea its cliche but its only cliche up to the point its been experienced. and vise versa because, for me, when i love him i'll do things for him. like read the bible or go somewhere or do something he wants me to even if i dont want to. OR even go all the way to The united states for just a few hours just so a little girl there knew that i was loved A LOT. hehehe. but that's not God doing that. he would, but that's not who i was talking about. lol

I hope i didn't repeat myself too much.
MMMMBye!

ms. taciturn

My apologies for not blogging and depriving those few who actually read this blog. My activities have been none of the exciting.

There's a friend that i have. (Dare i put it in print that i call this a friendship?) A relationship we have formed through the many arguments that at least one of ushad endured with patience. this relationship has been based on the kind of love that one reads about in 1 corinthians. it's hard to put into wordss what i think of it because it's not just a friendship that i have with anyone else. its not romantic and its not quite a family love. it's this trust i've formed without much basis other than "just trust me" as the phrase that was played over and over in mymind. It's weird, because for a long long tie i didn't like this friend i now have. I hated everything about his person. well, actually it was the aura i hated. it gave off a negative vibe. it still does. "we made up for lost time." and i guess it's working thus far. I've learned to put my trust in something. "walked on thin ice." i learned/am learning about love and what it should be like in God's eyes.

and that's it for now. i need to start walking home. we'll see about writing some more later.

Camp updates

camp is going ok. It's almost over. I was going to write all about how i feel about camp but now i'm not in the mood to write. camp is almost over. I think i said that already....I'm starting to get sad that its almost over. I will get to see dan though. which will make me very happy. : )) i miss dan. and i'm glad that emily is here. AND i got TWO three page letters while i was here AND a 4lb package from dolly.

so i have to go to work soon.
i love you guys who sent/gave me the letters and package. i miss you very much and i wish you were all here.

What joy for those whose record the LORD has cleared of sin, whose lives are lived in complete honesty! Psalm 32:2

Because of Jesus, God doesn't just look the other way when it comes to our shortcomings--he literally clears our record. Presto! Gone! When Jesus sees us, he sees only pure, spotless lambs. Have you been justified?

What joy for those whose record the LORD has cleared of sin, whose lives are lived in complete honesty! Psalm 32:2

Because of Jesus, God doesn't just look the other way when it comes to our shortcomings--he literally clears our record. Presto! Gone! When Jesus sees us, he sees only pure, spotless lambs. Have you been justified?

What joy for those whose record the LORD has cleared of sin, whose lives are lived in complete honesty! Psalm 32:2

Because of Jesus, God doesn't just look the other way when it comes to our shortcomings--he literally clears our record. Presto! Gone! When Jesus sees us, he sees only pure, spotless lambs. Have you been justified?

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged. 1 Corinthians 13:4-5

Consider your relationships with the ones you love. Are you demonstrating selfless, Christlike love?

Since i am doing better with our relationship God is starting to nag at me again. this verse was only one of many that i've read since yesterday. I'm glad i'm coming back home.

Today is camp day! i'm heading out at 10 and before that i'm going to say goodbye (again) to some people. it'll be a while before i see them again. i'll miss some of them. (love-hate). and then when i Do see them again i'll be my mean self. ;)
lots of love!

Happy Bday and yet another

Katie and Emily. actually, there's not too much to tell. Happy birthday and belated to the one. we alll love you very much.
Be good!

I CAN be nice!

Anyone who becomes as humble as this little child is the greatest in the Kingdom. Matthew 18:4

So often we try to look like we know all the answers and don't need anyone's help. Jesus says we ought to be like children--simple and honest about life and who we are. Now those are people he can use!

Like Jaden! i'm with Jaden right now! if life were as simple as Jaden makes it we could all try to be like Jaden and get lots of girls' attention and be in complete bliss.

These were some of the really cool desktop pictures i got from a site i found and thought i'd share these few because they reminded me of some friends of mine. :) ;)

I am focusing all my energies on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead. Philippians 3:13

Many spend their lives running and hiding, upset about the past, anxious about the present, and worried about the future. Remember that God is your shield! Put your full hope in him; he will meet every need.

i think i need to start doing that. Actually if i do that i might get further...
loves

i feel so much better now that i'm at camp meeting. something happened and i've been in a good mood for a whole day. that hasn't happened since school started last year. my good day started yesterday when i talked to my auntie who is in London (without me). This morning i talked to trouble and that disagreement makes me feel better now that i think we've gotten somehwere in it. I'm feeling more secure with how the summer is going to go, although i still have my doubts but i am almost sure i'm ready. I don't know how, after all year long bma has been so miserable socially and now its good enough for me to WANT to be around BMA.
But... Happy father's day out there to every father out there.


It was our weaknesses he carried; it was our sorrows that weighed him down. Isaiah 53:4

Do you ever feel like no one understands the pain you're feeling? Thankfully, we have a God who endured suffering on our behalf; he knows what our pain is like. And he sends his Spirit to comfort us when the night is dark.

Remember The Good Time

well along with my cute little brother, if you can see my haircut that is my new 'look.' i hope it's not too short.

from drake to Gina to me.

When i say... " I am a Christian" I'm not shouting "I'm clan living" I'm whispering "I was lost", Now I'm found and forgiven.

When I say ... " I am a Christian" I don't speak of this with pride. I'm confessing that I stumble and need CHRIST to be my guide.

When I say... " I am a Christian" I'm not trying to be srtong. I'm professing that I'm weak and need HIS strength to carry on.

When I say... " I am a Christian" I'm not bragging of success. I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... " I am a Christian" I'm not claiming to be perfect, My flaws are far too visible but, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... " I am a Christian" I still feel the sting of pain, I have my share of heartaches So I call upon His name.

When I say... " I am a Christian" I'm not holier than thou, I'm just a simple sinner who recieved God's good grace, somehow.

Now it's my turn.

I love how i've always heard the term christian expressed as this group of hypocrites.It's everywhere. Some claim to be perfect and we act to the contrary. So I am a christian and the above is the proclaimed. I'm a christian not only because i need Christ because he needs me as well, so that i can help him in his "master plan." So that I can shed some light and admit i'm not perfect and theres always going to be someone there who won't leave me no matter how much a jerk i'll be. That's real loyalty.

Whatever...Goodbye

i've been wanting to use that title for the longest time. i like it. i don't know why i like the phrase but i do. ]

If anyone remembers, i've said before everything seems to happen after i've come home from camp, right? well, camp hasn't even come or started yet and something has happened. ok.... something(s). The family's m+m nana has died. Yesterday afternoon around 3pm. There isn't much to say. The picture in a previous post with nana and the little girl that's her. It's funny because everyone came to see nana at least twice in the time she's been in the hospital. someone was almost always with her during the day. most of the time it was her daughter, my grandma fisher. at least 3/4 of her grandchildren came to visit her in the hospital. Nana was everyone's favorite. Everyone in the family went to her. she'd go out with her grandkid Deb, my aunt, every thursday to go shopping or out to eat or just out. my cousin loved her a lot. There's one thing I can't stand. And that's to see Emily hurting. That's almost the only thing or person that will get me to cry. Yesterday was the second time in not even a year yet that i saw Emily in pain like that. In... sorrow. The better part of it is that she ran 11 sets of stairs twice and 1/2 and i ran them not even once. We got to sit on the 11th floor on the hospital and enjoy alive water and share a piece of cheesecake. way to be healthy.
So here's how i can relate the whatever...Goodbye part into all this. Actually, into something completely unrelated. Mom's in her old self again. She disowned me (again) this morning. she claims she didn't and i can't prove that she did because it was over the phone. but whatever. I went throught the crying part already this morning and i'm on break from that. She's being difficult. Hence the wanting of Dolly around. I even contemplated calling Laura this morning just to hear someone talk to me but figured it was a bit too early for that and it's her day off. My thought process ended up with i can just walk it off, it'll be healthy for me and i have no need that is that urgent that it is necessary for me to call Laura at this hour. So i walked 2 1/2 miles at 6:30 this morning and listened to evanesence, eminem, mandy moore(only hope x4) starfield, caedmon's call and michael w. smith all this morning.
My auntie chris is awesome. she makes me smile...

Music, life, love and friends

I am learning...Slowly but surely i'm learning a little bit of something.
read Gina's blog. it sums al this up in 3 paragraphs. i've realized...

I'm learning that the hospital can have positives. My great grandma is in the hospital still. She's been in and out of there during the month. My mom, period. Really, these things are quite rejuivinating and relaxing to me. It's the real world- not the bubble. :)

Love:
I'm learning to love like Jesus as well as loving as if i've never been hurt. these two things i need to work out. my saying as it goes..."you've ripped my heart out, thrown it against the wall, AND play darts with it." And love always trusts. How can i love someone if i don't trust them? and If i love/trust God then i should be able to love/trust humans as well, correct? They both go hand in hand.

Friends:
Love ties in with friends too. The people i 'love' are distant from me as of recent. Their lives are changing and they're making decisions. Sometimes which means moving far far away or just making the lack of communication harder for at least one end to stay the faithful friend. (meaning no doubts on whether or not they've dropped you for the birds to pick at) I mean, ok so maybe i'm a bit dramatic but i have my days too. :) So, how can i trust(love)them back after they say they trust/love me. love requires action. That's one thing i learned this year. "love requires action" was written on my dorm room wall. :) Other people have expressed that to me too. FrouFrou face tried to make that clear to me.... It's a love-hate relationship there. ;) if you're reading thank you. Out LOUD!! Froufrou face has made me think some more. I haven't retained it all but with repetition i'll learn that in time too. I think i'm being critical of this love-hate relationship because the person is seeming to be open and say they care about me and the last couple times i've trusted it doesn't last. it drifts. that's what it currently seems like.

rough patches can be a pain.
dan and peter have been great people to go to though. Peter has been a great support system in the last couple of weeks when it comes to the bubble problem. and whether or not i really want to go back to the bubble next year even though i think it will be best for my future. I'm done talking about going back to school or not. I'm serious this time. :)

I'd really love to be working under Wendy because i feel like all the air around her says God and i really really enjoy that. Jeremy and James and Gina J. all have that and not one of those people i have to help me get through the summer at LLC. I'm excited but scared because i am going to be staff and it's all about God and the camper's experience with Him. So i either need to figure it out before camp, really sit and talk and figure things out enough so that i can love and live life.
My RA told me that hurt is only when you let it affect you. or something to that effect. What she said is what got all this 'stuff'in my head in motion. or at least something to think about... If i don't allow myself to hurt, feel pain or drama then i'm not going to be able to learn and thus it will become harder to help others because i hadn't had the experience to retain the knowledge. and if i can not feel hurt then i can also not feel joy.and that' wouldn't be cool because i want to be happy with God and be able to scream for joy when i see people like Katie and dolly and emily because it is way to rare that i see them or even hear a word from them and when i do it is a priveledge.

love and get hurt- so start over again. Make friends-help them grow- they move on- start over. family: be the adult, then cry, pray and counsol them and advise them. which usually means the older adult is the one that is being advised by the younger.
Why can't we just have the world domination and purify the earth and start over. ;) j/k

hahaha! almost forgot the music part. Music is good for the soul. :)) no it's good for the soul, for real. Dan playing the guitar is the most relaxing sound in the world.
k, i think i'm done

ok So i'm definitately in Maryland now!! i saw Wendy!!! Jeremy, James, Denise and i'm with both Gina and Jeanna. it's pretty sweet. just pray for the staff people this weekend.

g'night

Life Today

so hey, i'm at the spring picicinic. I brought "why you act the way you do" with me just because. I haven't read it, or even looked at it for a while so i figured i would have time today since i finally finished all my projects.
Life is going. I dont have any classes all day. :)) that's a winner. Also, i'm going to be outside most of the day and i'll be ablet o get online for most of it too. :)) so if you are available anybody i'm around.
It's really beautiful outside. there's a guitar playing in the background. The voices around me are only dinstant murmurs. It's like hearing life from the outside again. The bubble I have been living in has started to become irritating and the outside world is tugging at my shirt like a little sibling wanting attention.

In other thoughts, the end of the school year is coming up fast. My RA, shelly is about to graduate. It's been a good year learning new things about her and finallly clicking with her. That was an achievement in itself. :) I'm soon going to start thinking about the end of the year gift for a couple people. Nothing big. I haven't decided yet. A thank you letter is definitaely necessary. I've been telling everyone that i'm not coming back next year. I honestly don't know and i will go back to public school unless God litterally drags me back here, suitcase and all. I would much rather come back if i were a village student but that would be hard living an hour and 1/2 away. It's not far but still costs.

Crash landing is soon. just a few more days. I'm SOO excited for going to DC. It's... it's AMAZING. i miss DC. I miss city lights and sidewalks and NO BUBBLES!!! The last couple times i was in maryland i didn't go horseback riding because my aunt's hobrse was too far away. :( but that's ok. there's always summer. new horses and all. I'll miss zana and maggie and a certain horse lady but i'll move on no doubt. :P
wow.. it's been a really long time since i typed, since i've written. The campus 'bubble' has me wrapped around it's figure with everything but the things i enjoy. Writing, reading and time with God. Yesterday i wrote to God and stuff. It's been a while since i talked to him.. it feels like forever. (it's probably been a couple days really)

CAMP IS SOON. I'm excited to see little kids. to see kids. to be me. to stop being this masked person i've turned into. a happy little girl who tries too hard. but whatever. No boys for the summer and i'm staying away from bma kids. There's more out there besides this place called BMA. yea, it's cool at times but too emotionally draining. the school work isn't hard now that i feel organized. really i'm not but i can focus. I have my musis to jam to in the morning and a shower. Those are the things that make it worth it.
nothing more. As always, want Dolly to come home but whatever. I'll get over that too. She's got a life. ;) well... hehehe i gotta go do the whole running deal. that sounds good too. a good run. but i'm here at bma bubble. God is good.

I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT!!!

OK, so heres the exciting news that mrs. engen told me!!! I don't have to take American government or Psychology my senior year!!!!!!!! I still want to take a stewart class though so we'll see how that goes. :)) BUT!!! the fact that i don't have to take it makes me ecstatic. BUT i like those two classes because i already like those two subjects. :)) I took civs and a class equivelant to psych my freshman year. :))
This weekend is Seven Last Words and academy days weekend. ANd that's about all that i'm excited about. Life is still as usual. Still wanting to go back to Public school because i can get soo many credits and then come back here my senior year and really not have to work so hard. :)) :)) :))) but whatever. :)

lots of love to my peeps.

Your unfailing love is better to me than life itself; how I praise you! Psalm 63:3

In times of loneliness, what gives you comfort? Is it your material possessions or God's companionship and unfailing promises? Eagerly wait for God to fill you with his love!

So this was the devotional today and i'm glad i got it. right now i'm feeling really kinda crappy from more than one thing. Since the weekend started my days have been full of crappiness. I'm thankful for what he's doing (why he's doing it i dont know but w/e) but i'm still not enjoying the process very much because what i want to do is crawl up into a big comfy bed and be comforted (or not) by a friend who would just physically be there. In all reality, i don't need that physical being because i know God's there but reassurance is always nice.

After one phone call and that ending on a bad note i called another because i needed to apologize for doing something. It was eating at me all day long and i wanted to do it in person but that person never came to the dorm. I waited for the stuff that person had to do and then called. It made me feel a little better to talk to them so God had me there. :) He knows what I need. :)
Still lovin' ya God. you're good. ....all the time. :)
ok have a couple other things i'd like to do. nothing important but i'm alive and waiting for camp. :))

HA I WIN! HAPPY BDAY

Happy Birthday to YOU

ok so tomorrow is Dolly's birthday and in case i don't actually get to tell her happy bday so happy bday in short. i was going to try to upload these to things i made but obviously it wont let me.. so whatever. happy birthday

I refresh the humble and give new courage to those with repentant hearts. Isaiah 57:15

Even though God's ways are beyond our under- standing, he still cares deeply about us. But we must be willing to come before him with a humble, repentant spirit.

At last everyone will say, "There truly is a reward for those who live for God; surely there is a God who judges justly here on earth."Psalm 58:11

Has life treated you unfairly? Take heart. Those who hurt you do not have the last word; God does. He will judge the wicked and reward the righteous.

i was supposed to blog about something funnny yesterday but now i forget what it is.

Here's the news updates:

• last tour of the year was cancelled last night due to a series of problems
  
• my little brother is turning 6 this weekend and i might be able to go home for it.
  
• because the tour was cancelled all the talking i was going to do will need to happen at bma instead of trapped on a bus. ;)
  
• Mr. flores' daughter is in the hospital( so pray bout that)
  
• emily carlson came and left :(
  
• we need a task force dean for next year
  
• i'm afternoon desk worker next year (if i return- mother related)
  
• Women are still fickle
  
• Instruments are still my only love
  
• Trust is still an issue for me but it's coming along.
  
• I can play the first movement of braudenburg on the violin and viola without mistakes
  
• Some of my friends are still too far away and i miss them very much. VERY MUCH
  
• AND miss K. Carlson- i miss her hugs
  
• Pray for dearest friend dan.
  
• oh, and this summer, for people who don't know yet(katie), i'm working as kitchen staff this summer at camp. I'm going to make it a good summer no matter what and i'm GOING to strive for God and his presence at LLC.
  
• My roomate is still a living roomate. :) ;)
  
• All the Emily's I know are still really cool. kinda wish i was an emily sometimes... ;)
  

Judas came straight to Jesus. "Greetings, Teacher!" he exclaimed and gave him the kiss. Matthew 26:49

When someone hurts you, it can be devastating. The pain can make you never want to trust another human again. Jesus knows what it's like to be betrayed--and yet he offers you his consolation and sustaining love.

I am disgusted with my life. Let me complain freely. I will speak in the bitterness of my soul. Job 10:1

We need to reverence God, but that doesn't mean we can't be honest with him about our struggles. Job, in the Old Testament, certainly was. Like Job, you can be straight with God. His ear is tuned to you.

If you ignore criticism, you will end in poverty and disgrace; if you accept criticism, you will be honored. Proverbs 13:18
It can be hard to take criticism, but criticism offered in love with wisdom can be a true blessing in disguise. Ask God to help you be gracious when others offer strong advice.

You know what stinks? When I give someone grief because they haven't updated their blog and then I, myself don't update for a LONG time. :)So, I'm in maryland. There's nothing planned today except for going to this show at 2pm. Olney theater it is called.

So, i'm in maryland with my aunt. Didn't get back to her house til 3am and got up at 8:30.
ok i'm out. wanna find someone.

So i've started this prayer log thing on my computer. It's pretty sweet because there's a lot I can do in this program so i hear. The down side of it is, i don't know how to do any of the cool stuff. But every day for the past... 2 weeks, since i started on the puter, i logged everyday.It's pretty awesome for me. I've always enjoyed writing, and a couple years ago i started a prayer journal up thinking, it be good for me to write something. Then I stopped. I think it was last year(?) i got a little revolve journal and decided while i was at camp i'd try to write in it every day and it turned into a prayer journal in the end. I don't write in it much anymore though. It's in my closet in the dorm with another journal my cousin got me. I think its because i'm starting not enjoy writing as much as I used to. I don't have an intrest to write. I only write letters to people now and thats not very often anymore either. I've made this attatchment to the keyboard now and it makes writing for me so much easier and faster. :) So when I started this journal on my puter I decided everytime I would write in it, it would be thanking God for something more than asking him for anything. They don't have to be big things. Like thanking him for the sunshine or thanking him for helping me find something or helping me think of creative ways to send a smile or a message to someone far far away- or even in the dorm for that matter. ;) It's pretty cool because He's like this friend who helps me out whenever i need it or sends me little messages of 'i love you' through out the day and it makes me thankful for being at bma sometimes. Even sometimes i think he's telling me, this is for you because you're sticking it out at bma. (even if i don't like it) ;)
So i got this in my inbox today from my daily devotional and thought of my prayer journal on my puter.

I recall all you have done, O LORD; I remember your wonderful deeds of long ago. Psalm 77:11

Take time to remember what God has done for you.

[Simeon said,] "As you promised me, I have seen the Savior." Luke 2:29-30

All of the good promises that the LORD had given Israel came true. Joshua 21:45

Simeon believed God would show him the Messiah, but he waited 80 years. Can you trust God when it seems like he won't come through? Hold on--he is faithful.

Live in harmony with each other. Don't try to act important, but enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don't think you know it all! Romans 12:16

As a perfectly blended quartet plays in flawless unison, so God wants his children to work together. Beautiful music is best made when each musician plays his or her part.

Prayers and Praises

Prayer Requests:
For Katie.
~God, just be with her. God, hold her up bring her joy and love. Allow her to grow in you and through you she can get in the saddle and feel the warmth and freedom around her. Lord, take care of her. ~
For my mom-
~ she's just struggling to keep bills together and the house up. God, send a miracle.~
For people looking for a summer Job
~ There's a lot of people who want to work at a camp this summer and are praying to be able to have the oppurtunity to work at one this summer. Whatever happens, point them to where you think they will do the best work.~
For Life/ This world-
~ I read in ecclesiastes, chapters 7-9 NLT version and God already knows my input on that so... yea.. God's cool. He just needs to be spread through the world. He needs to be known all over. Not a big deal right? When that happens the sorrow here will be gone. ~

Praises:
well, there's only one. Dolly. The end. I'm just happy and yea... thanks God. Thanking you on the World wide web. How cool is that?!! Yea, i know, i'm smart. ;)

Dream come true

WELL.... My auntie Christiane came to visit me!! we spent from noon til 6pm just chillin' and catching up on a little stuff. It was awesome. She's really cool like that because she comes up just because. Just to see her little niece. AND well... She and I have been talking AND she was able to hook me up with my dream computer!!! I am SOO HAPPY!! SOO thankful!! I am making monthly payments on it and when I do go home i'm going to try to start up an automatic transfer to her account so that i dont have to spend the time doing that. :) I will have to show everone then! anywho, i need to finish doing stuff! I'm off i just had to tell the world wide web about my awesome aunt and how amazing she is and how cool she was to come visit me. :))

While he was still a long distance away, his father saw him coming. Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him. Luke 15:20

What is God like? In the story of the lost son, he is a patient, loving Father. Even when we turn against him, God has compassion on us.

I was writing last night about my day and thought it would be nice to tell ya'll the nice morning i had. Yesterday morning, during work, Abby H. and I went to help Mrs. D find her way out to the road, shoveling. :)) we had fun. God, Abby and I all had fun. It was cool cause God was playing with us as if throwing snow at us while we worked/played in the snow. :)) It was pretty sweet and the two of us were just talking to God like he was right there but he had control of everything. He whipped the snow up at us, Abby really. It was funny. It was just cool to feel connected and having fun with God involved. That is basically all for now. i need to do stuff for webdesign.

Happy Valentines Day

For God so loVed the world,
> That He gAve
> His onLy
> BegottEn
> SoN
> That whosoever
> Believeth In Him
> Should Not perish,
> But have Everlasting life."
> John 3:16

Happenings...

To start off, the person i miss today is Emily Y. She really is a cool person. She's a good friend too. Although i'm not around her enough, from time to time i see/hear second hand things of her kindness and loyalty to her close friends.

I recently had a realization about a friend while talking late with another friend. we'll call the person Kodak. Anywho, Kodak wanted to know what was soo great about this friend who we'll call.... Cindy. Anyway, i was trying to explain to Kodak the reasoning of Cindy's place in my heart and I finally figured it out while talking to Kodak. It just hit me. So this is what i told Kodak.
"So I met 'cindy' way bak when and the first year i saw her, I didn't really know her at all. So the following year i was in her cabin. I somehow connected with her and we clicked....blah, blah, blah... " long story short, "I think God sent her to me not only as a friend but as someone to help me get closer with God and someone as an example. An example of hope and faith. That "this too shall pass..." A hope that no matter what, God can help me out and Cindy helped me see that just by who she is. She and I related very well when it came to... pretty much everything... our lives. "she's a living example of God's work through someone that he deeply cares about." (That's what it was that i said! ha!! i FINALLY remember!!) I told Kodak that. I told Kodak that she was more than hope and faith and Someone that God had given me, she was someone who was really there and understood all the poop i was tolerating and still tolerate. But now, i do it with more trust and hope in myself and in God. I have someone that i can hold on to and see that God really cares about people and he sent 'Cindy' to me to tell me just that. and as soon as i realized that after talking to Kodak i was pretty much crying because of the realization in and of itself. I never really looked at it that way until i said it full heartedly to Kodak, a friend that is becoming very dear to me. And Kodak knows it too. I was really quite greatful, because I think God was speaking through me but to me at the same time and it was really moving when i heard what i was saying.
So that is my thoughts on that for today. One day maybe i will transform it into a testimony. :) I have thoughts about it already. :)

Switching moods completely, for spring break i'm going to Maryland to stay with my auntie and i get to ride her horse and i'm SOO excited because i'm wanting to start from scratch again and learn everything over again.. pretty much everything.. Although i'd like to be taught by the one who first taught me everything, which is very little, i'm happy to get to ride, even if its just in a ring with a bunch of mirrors. Plus, auntie told me that her horse has this way of telling the rider if he/she is doing something wrong. --which is WAY COOL. She trained this horse from scratch pretty much, so i'm told, so however she mananged to teach him that, props to her.

and now.. off to chat with jenny

I'm soo excited about this! I NEVER thought i'd make it on someone's website to talk about. one of Mr. Morgan's sites talked about pathfinder weekend at Laurel lake. I meant to get his pictures but not this way. :))

Today is a good day. I talked to Angela S and it became a very good day. I know i've repeated it a lot but she is so cool. Anyway, i have to do work now so i'll talk more later!

Emily Made Me

Four jobs you have had in your life:

1. Gdorm worker
2. camp something or another
3. Babysitter
4. Librarian asst.

Four Movies you would watch over and over:
1. Just like Heaven
2. Matilda
3. Fantasia
4. Ever After

Four Places you have lived:
1. Gaithersburg, Md
2. Hamburg, Pa (if that can count)
3. elsewhere in MD
4. Mechanicsburg, PA

Four of your favorite foods:
1. blueberries
2. rice anything
3. lomaine
4. some kind of thai dish i ate once..

Places you’d rather be right now:
1. Damascas (sp?), Maryland

2. Poland
3. anywhere but school, preferably with friends
4. summer camp

People I hope will respond by posting on their blogs:
1. Emily 2. Dan 3. Dolly 4. Danish

Don't be afraid; you are more valuable to [God] than a whole flock of sparrows. Matthew 10:31

How much are sparrows worth? Not very much, but God knows when each one falls. How much are you worth? You have inestimable value in God's eyes. When you feel hopeless, remember God knows you and deeply cares for you.

Oh... more memories... who knows if i have posted them already... i love them... i miss the people in them...

I uploaded the most recent pictures onto webshots but here are a few for show.

Emily E. You ARE amazing! I miss you soo much! The whole world must know! ;) :P

OK, well its right before my first test. pray for me! i have 3 today!!! and yesterdays i didnt do so hott on.

Tomorrow...

Tomorrow is the start of homeleave!!!This weekend pathfinders are coming to my church, this homeleave i'm going to visit two aunts and one of my best friends to celebrate her sweet 16. This homeleave i'm going to Chimney's to get 2 G strings, one for my cello and one for my viola and rosin and get my bridge fixed hopefully. (that is going to cost A LOT) Umm... I am going to sleep, study and sleep some more. I'm going to find another book to read and hopefully be able to get a book or two for class. AND i'm going to attempt to start saving up for the laptop i want. and with the budget i have now, i dont know how i'm going to be able to get everything considering i'm trying to save for a puter.

OH, and i forgot to mention in the blog about camp visit, that one of the first things i did after i got there and had worship WAS indeed stand out on the balcony and feel the breeze against my face and the snow under my feet and inhale all the beauty of the mountain area.

Tomorrow...

Tomorrow is the start of homeleave!!!This weekend pathfinders are coming to my church, this homeleave i'm going to visit two aunts and one of my best friends to celebrate her sweet 16. This homeleave i'm going to Chimney's to get 2 G strings, one for my cello and one for my viola and rosin and get my bridge fixed hopefully. (that is going to cost A LOT) Umm... I am going to sleep, study and sleep some more. I'm going to find another book to read and hopefully be able to get a book or two for class. AND i'm going to attempt to start saving up for the laptop i want. and with the budget i have now, i dont know how i'm going to be able to get everything considering i'm trying to save for a puter.

OH, and i forgot to mention in the blog about camp visit, that one of the first things i did after i got there and had worship WAS indeed stand out on the balcony and feel the breeze against my face and the snow under my feet and inhale all the beauty of the mountain area.

Open Skies- David Crowder Band

Praise Him under open skies
Everything breathing, praising God
In the company, of all who love the King
I will dance, I will sing
It could be heavenly
Turn the music loud, lift my voice and shout
From where I am
From where I've been
He's been there with me
He's built a monument
His very people
So let His people
Sing, sing, sing

And it's so wonderful
Just to be here now

Chorus
Praise Him under open skies
Everything breathing, praising God
In the company, of all who love the King

Praise Him under open skies
Everything breathing, praising God
In the company, of all who love the King
Let us dance, let us sing
It could be heavenly
Turn the music loud and sing

Lift your voice to heaven
Lift up your head and sing
To the One who gave His love
This is our offering
Lift your voice to heaven
Lift up your head and sing
To the One who gave His son
Here our lives we bring

From wherever you are
Wherever you've been
He's been there
So let His people sing

And it's so wonderful to be here now
Wherever you are, wherever you've been
He's been there

101 ways to procrasinate

14 ways:

1. harass Shelly, my RA (which really isn't 'harassing' its more like showing my love.)
   
2. watch movies
3. pretend to be a crayon
4. make corny jokes
5. play dress up
6. blog about 101 ways
7. myspace
8. wish you had a cell phone
9. pretend to have a cell phone
10. play tic-tac-toe
11. sleep**
12. talk on the phone
13. take a shower
14. help somebody else procrasinate
    

well, its monday. it's better than yesterday's blah. Last weekend at LLC was beyond amazing. it was out of the water amazing. i was so with God during worships. It was amazing. AMAZING! I felt soo moved every time i was up on stage to sing- it wasn't just singing for the kids but i was singing to God. I felt heart-gripping close to Him. It was almost as if he was right above me smiling as he lovingly watched me sing praises to Him. I didn't let anything or anyone get in the way of my time with Him while i was there at LLC and that was the best part of it for me. Not letting anything interfere or bring me down, that is. I felt soo fulfilled and 'recharged' and reconnected. I was there to not only see a bunch of pathfinders, which warmed my heart, but to praise God with all of me. "it's all about the kids" at camp. But i can pretty much say that its about getting closer to God yourself, too.

LIKE WHOA AGAIN!

ok well... first of all.. i HAVE to post these amazingly BEAUTIFUL pictures of my dearest Dorota Ann because she looks soo AMAZING with long straightened hair she could have the world at their knees!
this is definitely a WHOA thing! but anyway, dolly, grow you're hair this long again!!! its BEAUTIFUL!!

I will be faithful to you and make you mine, and you will finally know me as LORD. Hosea 2:20

Jesus wants nothing less than to have a place in your heart forever. With cords of love he will bind himself to you--a holy spouse who will love you more than any human mate ever could.

My dear Martha, . . . there is really only one thing worth being concerned about. Luke 10:41-42

Everything else is worthless when compared with . . . knowing Christ. Philippians 3:8


Are you like Martha--always scurrying around, hoping to win God's favor? Allow yourself to sit at Jesus' feet and pursue the one good thing: knowing him.

Things I'm thinking about..